I originally published this back in March, but I just found a typo I'd missed and had to fix. Author OCD. Heh. So that's with this is now out of date. Sorry.
So, once again, we are in the thick of an absolutely
insane election cycle, when we’re all sitting here watching our country’s
whacko primary process to determine what our two choices are going to be for
the next President of these United States. Now, normally I make it a point to
try and not get too much into poitics online. It rarely goes well, people’s
feelings get hurt, and usually, no one changes their opinion. This post isn’t
about that. It’s not about any specific set of political leanings, it’s not
about showing a preference to one particular candidate over the other. This
would be more of a poitically ecumenical post, it could appeal whether you are
feeling the Bern, planning to Choose Cruz, or even *SHUDDER* Make America Great
Again. Hmmm. I guess I did give a little bit of a clue as to my own political
leanings there, huh? Sorry. I promise, no more of that for the rest of this post.
Well, I’ll try anyway. Like I said, this post isn’t about a particular
political stance. Basically, if you’ve been paying attention to the election at
all, you can see that for the most part, this has been without a doubt, one of
the most batshit insane elections we’ve ever experienced in this country. I
mean, you couldn’t write a show like this, no producer anywhere would let you
make it. So, whatever your political leanings might be, I’d guess that there’s
a pretty good chance that you’re feeling like your sanity’s taken a bit of a
beating during the hustings of the last few months, and let’s be honest, it’s
not going to get any better from here on out. I mean hell, if the front-running
GOP candidates can turn a debate about becoming the next President of the United
States into a literal penis-measuring contest, I’d say we’ve got exactly two
chances for this election to turn around and settle down into something sane;
Jack, and shit. And Jack just left town.
Anyway, like I said, your brain’s probably taken a
beating from watching all these shenanigans, so I’m here to recommend
three works of quality literature that I think might just help you keep what
sanity you do possess. Two of them are works of total fiction, and the last is
MOSTLY factual. Hehe. Anyway, we’ll start off with the fiction. And just so you
know, these are only in the order in which I thought of them. They’re all
fantastic.
Orange
Crush by Tim Dorsey
Tim Dorsey writes books that are similar in tone to
Carl Hiassen. Pretty much all of Hiassen’s books could be titled the same
thing: “Weird Shit Happens in Florida”. Well, Dorsey fits this kind of vein
very well. Much like Hiassen, Dorsey’s books could also all be called the same
thing. It would even be a similar title, but Dorsey’s books could pretty much
all be called “Weird Shit Happens in Florida, With an Extreme Florida-Phile Serial
Killer Who Targets Jerks”. Orange Crush departs from the formula a bit, but
there are still plenty of weird goings-on, and the madness is pretty much all
focused on the Florida governor’s race. Check out the back blurb:
The Republicans'
"golden boy" -- and a loyal, unquestioning tool of the powerful
special interests -- handsome, unthreatening, Florida governor-by-default
Marlon Conrad seems a virtual shoo-in for re-election. That is, until he
undergoes a radical personality shift during a bloody military action in the
Balkans. Now it's just three weeks before the election and Marlon is suddenly
talking about "issues" and "reform" as he crosses the
length and breadth of his home state with an amnesiac speechwriter and a chief
of staff who turns catatonic in the presence of minorities. The governor's
new-found conscience might well cost him the election, though. And it appears
that pretty much everybody from Tallahassee to Miami Beach is trying to kill
him...
And that about tells you everything you need to know.
This is a newer edition to my Keep Sane During Elections Reading List, but I don’t
hesitate to recommend it. The entire governor’s race in the book is pretty
nutty, but you just may find yourself wishing that you could actually vote for
Marlon in real life. I know I’ve wanted to that a few times over the last few
months.
Transmetropolitan
by Warren Ellis and, Darick Robertson
Transmetropolitan, or Transmet, as many of the cool
kids call it, is a fantastic comic book. Instead of the usual superheroes and
supervillains, the comic focuses on the struggle between our hero, intrepid,
drunk and drugged-out investigative reporter Spider Jerusalem, who is basically
the somewhat distant future’s version of Hunter S. Thompson and two insane and
insanely corrupt Presidents of the United States, first, The Beast, who is
basically Future Nixon, and then, Gary Callahan, or The Smiler who looks like a
cross between Tony Blair and The Joker. Though he acts a lot more like The
Joker. The comic is all about Spider, who when the story begins is happily
living up a mountain in isolation, but has to return to The City to write two
more books for his old editor or get sued, haunting the streets in search of The
Truth, armed only with his fists, his Filthy Assistants, Channon and Yelena,
his wits, and his illegal Bowel Disruptor(and yes, that’s a gun that does
exactly what you’re probably thinking it does).
Spider tackles all kinds of
subjects throughout the course of the series’ 60-issue run; things ranging from
prejudice, religion, corrupt police, the bizarre City of the future trying to
hang on to pieces of the past, and especially politics. The series is at its
best when Spider is going against The Smiler and trying to bring down his
presidency with the power of journalism. Vol. 3: Year of the Bastard is where
this is especially in evidence. This is the PERFECT series to read during this
political season, because things in the comic are possibly even more insane
than what we’ve all been watching for the last several months. I’m not sure
though, I’m going to have to give the series another look, because I think this
may indeed be a case of reality being stranger than fiction. Anyway, the series
finished its run a few years ago, and all the issues are collected into trade
paperbacks, or a couple of DC Absolute editions if you feel like shelling out
the ducats. It’s absolutely worth it though.
Finally, we leave the world of fiction and come to…
Fear
and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail ’72 by Hunter S. Thompson
It may seem out of date, considering that this book is
more than 40 years old at this point, but honestly, you’d be hard-pressed to
find a better book on an election anywhere, no matter when it was written.
Forget Game Change, forget any of the drivel written by Ann Coulter, this is
the election book you want to read. Written by the late, great Hunter S.
Thompson of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas fame, the book covers Thompson’s
experiences covering the 1972 Presidential election between Richard Nixon and
George McGovern, and he really manages to capture the insanity of an election
in his trademarked Gonzo journalism style. Once again, check out the back cover
blurb:
From the legendary
journalist and creator of “Gonzo” journalism Hunter S. Thompson comes the
bestselling critical look at Nixon and McGovern’s 1972 presidential election.
Forty
years after its original publication, Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail ’72 remains a cornerstone of American political journalism and
one of the bestselling campaign books of all time. Hunter S. Thompson’s searing
account of the battle for the 1972 presidency—from the Democratic primaries to
the eventual showdown between George McGovern and Richard Nixon—is infused with
the characteristic wit, intensity, and emotional engagement that made Thompson
“the flamboyant apostle and avatar of gonzo journalism” (The New York Times).
Hilarious, terrifying, insightful, and compulsively readable, Fear
and Loathing on the Campaign Trail ’72 is an epic political adventure that captures the
feel of the American democratic process better than any other book ever written
I’m telling you, if you
only read one book on this list, you should read this one. Then, you should
honestly go out and read the rest of his work because you really can’t go
wrong. Yes, a lot of references to drugs, alcohol and a LOT of bad language,
but dig down a bit if that kind of thing bothers you and look at what he was
saying underneath all that. Honestly, I’m really disappointed that Thompson is
no longer with us, because I’d love to hear his thoughts on these current
shenanigans we’re going through. Honestly, if the last few months are any
indication, if he was still around, I’d imagine that Hunter could have gotten
another great book out of it; Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail 2016.
Especially all this Trump nonsense. I think that was right up Hunter’s alley
and he would have gone to TOWN on The Donald. Ah well, a man can dream.
So there you have it,
dear readers. A short list of a few things that may just help keep you from
going completely out of your skull this election. Hope this list is helpful,
and that just maybe, you find something new that you really enjoyed reading. All the cover images I've used here are of course copyright by their respective publishers, and all of these books are available online, or from your local seller of quality tomes. hehe. And
lastly, no matter what side of the aisle you come down on, when the time comes,
be sure to get out there and vote. If for no other reason, than to retain full
rights to complain about things when they don’t go your way. Hehe.
Carry on smartly, my
friends.
